The Consistent Inconsistencies in PotC
by Ryuu Angel
Summary: I dunno how te sum up this... Ye love the film? Have ye seen it enough times te stop and have a close look te it? Ye have. And have found some things that are... difficult te understand. Unanswered questions. Here be mine : ) Enjoy!


_Disclaimer: With a little bit of (or rather, LOTS OF) luck, I'll own a hat like Jack's [and I can kill to get that ;p]… and I also own the money and time spent at the cinema to watch the film 5 times [tomorrow 6 ^^] but *sobs* no matter how much I've prayed, I still don't own Captain Jack Sparrow *cries*, so I'm gonna go and drown my misery in a bottle of rum *sniff*_

A/N: Ayee, call me crazy but I was in the cinema [hooow strange] and this kind of questions popped in my mind the third time I was sailing the Caribbean Seas in the Pearl [in my imagination, of course *resigned sigh*], and I decided to write them down… if ye have an answer for some of them, or wanna add yer own ones, just tell me and I'll be more than willing to post them ^__^ I actually uploaded this again to correct some minor mistakes and add some comments on topics already discussed before… I'll post a new chappie with some of your unanswered questions and the answers I've been given for some questions ^^

The Consistent Inconsistencies in PotC 

by: my insane mind [say, me = Ryuu]

It all starts in a foggy morning [afternoon? evening? Err…. day] with a small Elisabeth Swan singing a pirate song. 

And we wonder… are pirate songs *that* popular in England? ^^U where the heck did our little Elisabeth learn that song? Of course, maybe she bought in her book shop "The 10 most popular Pirate Songs. Special Edition for Children"… 

Okay, we forgive her. She's smart, she's rich and has a dad who worships her. And reads a lot about pirates [ahhh I'd love to have a look at her library…].

And she sees this umbrella. Floating in the water. And she smiles. She *smiles* as if finding a lost umbrella in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean was the most normal thing in the world! *snorts* but I can still forgive her. Aye, ye can, too, believe me. But then…

Dun du duuun… Will Turner's in screen! Luckily for the lad Elisabeth doesn't think that he is as common as the umbrella, and shouts for help. Don't need t'tell ye what happens I know… but just have a close look to the medallion chain. 

Here ye get a really interesting case of "adaptable length chain". Now, on small Will's neck , it's short. Okay, not a choker… but when Elisabeth wakes up from her dream, the cursed coin reaches down t' her bosom, enough for her to hide it. Lemme take ye t' some minutes later, with Elisabeth with Barbossa and the rest of pirates going into Muerta the first time: the chain has shortened mysteriously *X-files music plays I the background*. And that's not the end of it, ooh no ladies and getlem-ugh, sorry, _pirates_… when Will wears it, 'tis also short. Had the curse this funny "variable length" effect on the chain attached t' it?

Have ye ever tried t' take off a necklace with a simple and small pull?? My big sis once tried with one of these old ones, and she nearly lost her neck in trying [though I think she exaggerated a little ^^U…]. So, how come our beloved medallion comes off that soon and effortlessly?

I've come t' the conclusion that this doesn't happen always: when it has to compete against some other necklace, then our medallion acts tough and decides t' stay on Elisabeth's neck. Ye lads ask me how do I know? Well, picture the ceremony for Commodore Norrington with lovely Elisabeth nearly asphyxiating: she's wearing a pearl necklace, and the medallion. When she falls and Jack [*drools a bucket*… ahem, sorry it won't happen again ^^U… I'll try at least!] saves her, she only has the medallion on. 

Pearls vanished. Oh yeah. It opened. Got lost in the Caribbean waters. Buut… medallion stays, although anyone can take it off her neck with a pull… ?__?

Elisabeth survives. The fight, and Jack is captured [*grumbles*]. And that night, the Black Pearl comes t' Port Royal. And that's another start point for my questions [aye, still have t' bear with me ppl!]

How the heck do they know that the medallion is there? And that Elisabeth has it? Soldiers do not know about the Black Pearl but in legends, and they don't even believe them… some may say, and I agree: yes, the medallion called the Pearl when Elisabeth fell into the water. But how do they know it's her the one who has it? And if they don't know about it and, as Barbossa says, it's much easier to rob the dead… why do they kill everybody if they know that the one who has the medallion is the Turner they're looking for? Imagine Ragetti or Pintel killing someone and then discovering that it had the medallion. 'Oops, we killed the guy we needed to end the curse?'??? *snorts* But well, okay. They know Elisabeth has the thing. They're psychic. And even so… how can ye explain that they left Will alive and with the medallion eight years ago?? Because if little Elisabeth wasn't dreaming, the Pearl was there and was the responsible for that first shipwreck. How, *how* could the damn pirates let Will escape when he was less than a hundred meters away from them???!!! 

Will and Jack ally, blah blah… [there something strange happens with Jack's hat… aye, I'm totally obsessed with that hat!! And with the boots too… but I won't comment now ^^U]. Elisabeth in the Pearl, and do ye follow me, _me lads_?

Then, Barbossa invites Elisabeth to have dinner with him. Think with me: why should they have edible supplies if they can't eat!!!?? Ye say, well, it could be because they think that in four days the curse will be lifted and we'll be able to eat and drink again… but then so, did they make a nice stop at Port Royal to pick some edibles between kill and kill? And who cooks?? Barbossa with an apron? *stifles giggles and laughs*

There, Barbossa leads us to apples. How does he manage to have fresh and lovely apples 24 hours a day?? Mmmm… maybe he has an apple tree in a small plant pot? An orchard? Imagine… Barbossa going down t' his personal orchard in a secret cabin te water his dear apple trees *snorts* coz I don't think he goes te the market and buy?, bargain for them?

Then, dear Elisabeth finds out the curse thing; she's actually sailing with a crew of skeletons, and if ye watch closely, ye'll see none of them has a real nose. Of course they don't because it's not bone, in our skull we have a mark but not a real protuberance as a nose, it's just cartilage. Then, tell me why Barbossa *keeps* his nose! Does he think he's cooler than the rest? 'I have a nose, even in "cursed zombie" mode coz I'm captain'? Naaah…

And does the curse also affect their clothes?? Ye see them perfectly well [*sweatdrops* okay, I wouldn't say as much as that… but ye know what I mean ^^U] when moonlight does not touch them, but then suddenly turn to rags and tattered clothes. Huh? O_O - Yeah. 'unknown' has a point: dramatic effect *sigh*

Aye, lads, and tell me, in the cave after they find out Elisabeth has fled and the medallion has as well, they find themselves without oars, and that seems to be a major problem at the moment. Then, precisely when we *need* them te go by boat and Jack [*drools*… err, yes, I'm trying I swear] orders them te get in them, they decide te go "walking". And the "no boats" thing ain't a problem. Ahem… explanations?

I still wonder where Jack leaves his hat in the Pearl, but I hope te find out tomorrow [I think ppl at the cinema will already know me *sweatdrops*…]

Don't worry this is going to finish soon ^^UU…

Jack is God. Ohhh yeah, how can he drink that much rum and get up next morning without a monumental hangover??? He's used te it? But even so… Another funny thing is that Elisabeth seems te know every living [and dead] pirate's life and deeds!! How does she do that? Did pirates write books about themselves? How could Elisabeth get all that information?? She couldn't have asked his father and I doubt anyone would consider "pirates" as an appropriate matter of study for a high-class lady like her…

And yet more Jack… what kind of kohl does he use?? It doesn't come out even after… [*counts*] three major dives in the ocean, plus a storm, a few fights… hell, through the whole film! And I didn't get te see him putting on that make-up! I know he must carry a mini-mirror te paint his eyes like that… *drowns in drool and sighs* 

Make-up! What is Elisabeth doing in the cave the first time with lipstick?? Have a close look… aye, it is. I checked thrice.

Going near the end… Elisabeth escapes from her "prison". And she conjures a boat out of nowhere and a pair of oars te row to the Pearl *rolls eyes* but I know what happened! Barbossa told her the conjuring trick! Coz yeah, he does make appear an apple just like that in his hand when he dies. Where was he keeping it, huh?? A secret pocket? Under the hat? Aye, I noticed: captain is tossing the apple in the air when they go in the cave. But we lose its track after that! When Barbossa looks at the bullet hole in his chest [go go Jack!!!! *cheers*] he is not holding the apple… he wanted t'try and bite the apple before dying? *shakes head*

That makes me think of the banana Jack is holding in Tortuga when he's having a look at his crew, but gah, he's like that so *dreamy sigh* mustn't think much about it…

I found some others, but I think I bored ye so I'm not writing them down, they'll remain locked in my head along with all other unanswered questions *shrugs*. I didn't dare to mention any quotes or verbal inconsistencies I may find coz I don't trust the dubbing that much *sweatdrops* [aye, that means I didn't get to see the film in English… *yet*]

Maybe some day I'll write a nice piece of fanfiction for Jack and the rest of people in the film, got some ideas in my crazy head… aye, some day I will write them down! ^^U [improbable I would say, but not impossible ^.~]

Until then, _drink up me 'earties yo ho!!_

Ryuu ^^ 

PS: Today is the official "Talk like a Pirate Day"! I found out five minutes ago and I had no time to practise but well, I celebrated with rum *grins*

PS2: Do not get me wrong, I don't write this coz I haven't liked the thing: I'm writing this coz I love the film. In fact I've never been to watch a film six times at the cinema, not ever! And considering I have started wearing a red bandana all day, you could call me obsessed. Aye, insanely obsessed *sighs* 

I luv the film the way it is, but I guess it is totally impossible to make a film without any plot holes. So, justification te all of them is: if they were not there, film would not be as it is. And I like it as it is, so I would change nothing. Maybe add a second part with Jack in it ^__^ *drools even more* but aye, that's it. 

More inconsistencies coming in short ^^ [noooot many! Don't worry, me lads]


End file.
